Throughout my life I’ve always heard so much about dicks. Every day I’m constantly bombarded with commercials about condoms, Viagra, and how to make penises feel good. Straight cisgender men’s sexual pleasure is so prevalent in Western society. But what about what I and millions of other people in the world have? Why the fuck doesn’t anyone talk about vaginas? Many of us can’t even name our own biological parts or don’t understand their purpose. Well it’s time to switch it up. It’s time to learn more about our complex genitalia. So let’s talk vaginas.
I should mention that not all women have vaginas, and not all men have penises. I know, you might be a little confused, and everything you were taught as a child has just been stomped on, but bear with me here. Gender is actually a social construct. It’s something that we learn. It’s the moment when parents find out our sex and decide whether we’re going to wear pink or blue. But it isn’t actually something that’s biological. It’s also necessary to remember that all vaginas are different. Yeah, sure, when looking at it scientifically there are some standard similarities, but in many ways they differ. From size, to colour, shaven or unshaven, hymen or no hymen, vaginas are so diverse!
Even at 22 years old there are still many facts about my genital area that I’m learning. And I am by no means a doctor or specialist, but based on research and personal experiences, I’ve picked up a few things. If you have a vagina, here’s a little information about it that you might have not known:
1. Masturbation is super healthy
Masturbation actually does wonders for your health. From lowering stress, improving your sex life, and having the ability to uplift your entire mood (even if just temporarily.) It can even help with relief of UTI’s.
2. There is a lot more to the vagina…than the vagina
Mons Pubis, Labia Majora, Labia Minora. And that isn’t even the full list. There are so many different parts that make up the whole genital area. Now, I’m really about to confuse some of you. Believe me or not, but the vagina isn’t really what you think it is. All of the external organs of that area are actually called the vulva. The vagina is located inside of that. Mind. Blown.
3. You don’t get “loose” from having too much sex
This idea is forced especially on cis-hetero women. The assumption that the more sex she has, the less “desirable” her vagina will be due to its “looseness.” The truth is the vagina expands a lot when it’s aroused, and can comfortably accommodate for a penis (if that is your object of desire.) So the vagina’s ability to stretch is actually a great thing.
5. Relax, It cleans itself
The vagina is a self -cleaning organ. Put some water on it and let it be. Adding soap and scrubbing the area can throw off its pH level and kill bacteria that is actually supposed to be there. Yes, you read that right. Certain bacteria is good for your vagina. Just be gentle and leave it alone.
If you have a serious odor and are concerned then speak to your doctor, especially if the smell comes with soreness.
Quick tip: some foods such as garlic, red meat, and curry can cause it to smell a bit funky down there.
6. The clitoris is essentially a penis…yup
Okay, not completely. Obviously the clitoris is its own identity and not merely a penis. I just love throwing it out there to make homophobic cis-hetero men squirm. But in all seriousness, the clitoris and penis are basically made up of the same ingredients. The clitoris is actually way more sensitive than the penis, it gets hard, and it even grows!
7. Not all G-spots are the same
Every G-spot reacts to stimulation differently. So what works for one, won’t necessarily work for all.
Fun fact: Not everyone has a G spot!
8. Let’s talk about pubic hair
Many don’t want it, and no one is obligated to keep it. But it is interesting to know that pubic hair actually has a purpose. It can reduce issues including infections and even rashes!
9. If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get in my head
The brain and the vagina actually work together to assist you in reaching orgasm! When it’s sexually aroused, there is a signal sent to your limbic system; a part of your brain that controls your emotions. And it all goes up from there!
10. There is nothing wrong with you and your un-popped cherries
There can be a thin layer of skin across the vaginal opening, that’s called the hymen. If that layer still exists by the time you lose your virginity, it can pop and cause you to bleed. This is where the term “popped cherry” comes from. But it’s important to understand that not everyone has a hymen! Some are born without one, and some lose it through other (non-sex related) activities.
So there you have it! A few things about your vagina that you probably never learned in sex-ed. I’m no medical genius, so I must give credit where it’s due. Here are a few links to some of the online articles that I’ve used to help me learn more about my vagina! I also suggest having conversations with professionals, reading books, magazines, and looking into films that discuss this topic. So don’t limit your resources to just online material. Unfortunately I’ve struggled to find enough in depth resources for sexual education that is more inclusive of queer folks and looking at health benefits of queer sex and sexual activities. However, this list does include two articles discussing the importance of sexual education curriculum's that are LGBTQ+ inclusive and what that education might look like! But in regards to the overall facts about our genitalia and how to understand and take care of it, I think these first few links can be especially useful: